Act Normal

It seems like every day you hear about another celebrity going totally nuts. Mel Gibson, Lindsey Lohan, Christian Bale. You name the celeb and before long you'll hear about them saying or doing something either criminal or criminally stupid. Now obviously we're all human. We all have our little quirks, but for the most part you don't see the rest of us dissolving into a gooey puddle of crazy. Are there special circumstances? Sure, but these are the only people already trained to deal with them.

It seems like every day you hear about another celebrity going totally nuts. Mel Gibson, Lindsey Lohan, Christian Bale. You name the celeb and before long you’ll hear about them saying or doing something either criminal or criminally stupid. Now obviously we’re all human. We all have our little quirks, but for the most part you don’t see the rest of us dissolving into a gooey puddle of crazy. Are there special circumstances? Sure, but these are the only people already trained to deal with them.

The first thought you might have that would explain “wacky celebrity syndrome” (WCS) is the fact that these people are under constant scrutiny. Everywhere they go they are hounded by paparazzi and people wanting them to say a famous line or sign something. This would drive any normal person completely insane in weeks.That is absolutely true. It would drive any NORMAL person insane. But actors aren’t normal people. It is their job to have cameras pointed at them all of the time. And asking them to “do that thing” again and again? That’s called Take 1 and Take 2.Having an actor flip out because of that stuff is like having a secretary go off on a twelve minute rant because you gave them a call on their cell phone and they had to answer it. “But Decoychunk, that means that they never get time off. What if YOU never got any time off? Wouldn’t you go crazy?” Well first off I DON’T get any time off. By starting this site I turned my play into work. Second, they get plenty of time off.Even the most popular actors don’t shoot movies year round. And it isn’t like the paparazzi are hanging out in their houses.So they get at least as much time off as us. They’re just babies.

“Okay then,” you say, “You may have a point about that, but you just said that we are all a little nuts. They aren’t more nuts than us, they are just on camera all of the time, so on the rare occasion that they flip out, it is caught on tape.” Well to that I say, quit talking, this is my post.And also, we are talking about people who pretend things for a living. All they should have to do is act normal. Make it a part of acting school, maybe. The teacher pulls out a script and says, “This is Jack Jones. He is a bus driver from Union, NJ. He has a wife, three kids, and enjoys sports. He is a normal person. Act like him when you are in public.” They’ve got to be able to pull that off, it is in their job description.

Some people say that actors can’t handle reality, and that’s why they wig out. … Well I don’t know what that means, and I certainly don’t know how that is a defense in any way. Can’t handle reality? Seriously? You’ve been living there for your whole life. That’s like saying you can’t handle oxygen, or light. It isn’t hard, you don’t even have to try. Just breath in and out, eat occasionally, and try not to injure yourself or others. Presto! Reality handled. But let’s assume you are some kind of super-fruitcake who looks at reality and seriously says, “No sir, that’s not for me.” Fine, then just pretend that you CAN deal with reality. Then you’ll be living a fantasy, which means you won’t be dealing with reality, which means you will be fine. Check and mate.

It has thus been thoroughly proven that actors are wacko-bananas weirdos who have no excuse. The very life that has given them the problems they face has also given them all of the tools they need to cope.  Clearly the profession only attracts defective people. Either that or my observation that all actors are prone to crazy outbursts is based upon a gross and inaccurate generalization, misses several key factor

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About Decoychunk

Editor, Writer, and general Knower-Of-Words, if there is text to be read on BrainLazy, Joseph Lallo probably has his fingerprints on it. As the final third of the ownership and foundation of BrainLazy, Joseph “Jo” Lallo made a name for himself when he lost the “e” from his nickname in an arm wrestling match with a witch doctor. Residing in the arid lowlands of the American Southwest, Joseph Lallo is a small, herbivorous, rabbit-like creature with the horns of an antelope. He sleeps belly up, and his milk can be used for medicinal purposes. Joseph Lallo is also author of several books, including The Book of Deacon Series, book 1 of which is available for free here.